It has been a week of many discussions and health checks on my clients, each with their own goal in mind when it comes to better health and a smaller waistline. Their primary concern, “IT [- the journey -] is NOT going fast enough AND why bother, chances are I will have to do this again and again!”
Within any journey to health motivation can be a tall ask when the scale does not move and you have had a tough week, the only question left is do you continue or throw in the towel? Our frustration with our journeys clouds our perceptions and emotions and success seems to be unattainable. My job is to concentrate the focus of my client in on the present, lead them to right-mindedness ON their journey so that they NEVER have to take on this process again.
Success by any definition is attaining what you set your mind to, taking on achievement after achievement to reach what you see as an accomplishment to be proud of. I find many cross my threshold with absolute conviction of the success at the ‘end’ of their journey. Little do most realize that the ‘end’ is only the beginning and what stands in the way of NOW and THEN is only their PERCEPTION of what is true to them – RIGHT-MINDEDNESS. With every step forward there is a tendency to look back, assess where they came from and bemoan the journey that lies ahead. With this constant reflection on past and continual anxiety and or excitement about the future they miss the instant in which they find themselves in, being present. Now I know there is much talk about mindfulness but I would like more to focus on individual RIGHT MINDEDNESS than mindfulness. At the end of the day we are NOT our bodies, our minds and souls may reside in them temporarily but our sense of worth and value is not based on our bodies and how they look. As I coach people in looking great, feeling healthier and feeling confident every step of the way, this may seem like a contradiction as I DO help them reach their weight goals which ARE about WHAT they look like in the mirror, how they feel and the clothes they adorn. BUT... there is more and always is. No matter the weight we lose and the goals we reach, if we are not dealing with a change of perception and acknowledging our perfection [yes, you heard me right, no matter the size, we are all perfect beings in the present], chances exist that we will need to walk this journey again and again.
Right mindedness leads to success and keeping that success in place. We are beings of patterns, we get up, do our ablutions, brush our teeth, (some get on the scale, just to check…) get dressed, go to work, have family time and sleep, this is day in and day out, familiar patterns. Now we take on a regulated diet, get a coach involved to assist us and then the pattern changes slightly. We lose our weight, reach our goals and step straight back into the old FAMILIAR patterns once again. If right-mindedness is not incorporated into the journey and LEARNT, stepping back into the old pattern may also mean stepping back into the ‘previous’ body – the familiar.
I promised myself after losing 40kgs that that would be the last time I would see that fat, I was officially rid of it… 7 years later I was 40kgs plus more… What had happened? Besides the usual excuses of ill health, stress, anxiety, emotional eating, bad food choices, what had REALLY HAPPENED? I spent a year assessing the situation, trying different regulated diets and only got FATTER AND FRUSTRATED. In this time I realized that it all started with the mind – something I was aware of but never gave much true thought to, and with the understanding that what we think of manifested in our bodies I understood that I really need to pay attention and or change my thoughts. So, surely IT, success will be easy, change my thoughts… not that easy. We all hear this, change how you think and life gets better, then getting better with being present, our actions get better, results get better and just like that your waist gets skinny. If being healthy and skinny was as easy as sticking to a regulated diet and thinking good thoughts we would ALL be ‘there’.
This, the health journey, the weight loss journey is unpacking of the ‘YOU’ you think you are. This is the critical element; if we start by thinking of ourselves as a failure in the weight and health department we start off with a lack of faith in our bodies, in a sense, punishing and blaming ‘IT‘, externalizing the challenge we face, we feel our bodies have ‘let us down’. Punishing our bodies with a fearful thought of failure is never a good place to start. It reinforces littleness within which is so off the mark. And by the way, THIS is the THOUGHT we are supposed to ‘change‘… Let me help you step back, just one step, which will take away any thought of littleness, of failure or of fear – do try it. It will take awareness, it will take nurturing of YOUR right-mindedness, but it CAN happen in an instant if you accept it in an instant.
START HERE… YOU are a wholly powerful perfect human being, beautiful, valuable, loved, forgiven, made perfect by perfect, guiltless, fearless, magnificent, EVERYTHING and MORE… yes, absolute perfection. Start there. From this point onwards know your GREATNESS, allow this light to flicker and grow into a flame, thoughts WILL CHANGE and NOTHING will stop you on your journey. You WILL get the patience to climb every mountain you face, let go of the trivialities that have zero consequences and grow in faith that you are more than capable. We cannot control our thoughts, but if the foundation is shifted to our advantage, thoughts change. This journey IS about discovering all of this within, changing the familiar pattern only changes in changing the foundation on which it rests, not the food we take in, not the company we keep, the self-help books we read, the guru coaches we listen to. Only in starting with the KNOWLEDGE, the TRUTH of WHAT WE ARE do we manage to breed a new thought process. I have on my journey been told to underpin a thought with a strong emotion to add weight to it, to convince my subconscious of my desire for change, the only challenge is the EGO steps in and says “yeah right!“, for example, I would say “I see myself in absolute fantastic health and LOVE the energy I now have in every day!!!“, my ego steps in and whispers with a touch of sarcasm “Sure, you can’t even get out of bed in the morning… hows this working for you???!“. This ego, ‘SHE’ is not my friend and only by dissociating with IT and embracing the truth of WHO I AM do I manage to place it in the naughty corner and KEEP IT THERE. Believing 100% that I AM allows me to BE I AM. With this in mind, the journey becomes the discovery that allows me as an individual to not only succeed at improving health and weight but also in KEEPING IT OFF.
Are you tired of being on diet off diet, ever wondered WHY? Why do you end up back where you started, why the feeling of an eternal struggle? Tired of blaming diets, your boss, your husband or wife and the lack of exercise and time? Losing motivation on your journey, getting frustrated? Start IT differently. It is but one step backward that facilitates a complete shift of foundation which then DOES DRIVE your thoughts, which in turn drives your desire to reach your goal and maintenance thereof. Start with right-mindedness. Flip the switch.